At Mauritanian weddings, black evokes the desert sky

2008-08-29

Marriage in Mauritania is still governed by unique traditions. High dowries, however, are pushing the country's youth to break free from convention.

By Mohamed Yahya Ould Abdel Wedoud for Magharebia in Nouakchott – 29/08/08

[Mohamed Yahya Ould Abdel Wedoud] A Mauritanian woman dances in a tent during a wedding celebration.

Marriage in Mauritanian starts with the engagement, known as Eslam, where the groom offers money to the bride’s family when asking for her hand in marriage. Next, they set a date for the wedding or "the happiest night", as some like to call it.

The bride wears a black gown, a tiara and other jewellery, and has henna-dyed hands. A groom also wraps a black scarf around his neck. It is worth noting that the colour black, which symbolises grief in most Arab societies, stands for quite the opposite in the Mauritanian imagination. Sociologist Ahmad Salem believes that the dark desert nights, which have always been a refuge for Mauritanians, gave the colour black its special meaning.

Wedding celebrations in Mauritania continue for at least three days, a period known as Sobou. This can be very costly to the groom.

Well-off couples pay millions of ouguiyas for their weddings and lavish handsome sums on artists who sing poems praising the bride and the groom, a unique tradition deep-rooted in Arab culture.

Some university and college graduates, however, have gradually broken from the chain of traditions.

"I agreed with my fiancée to defy some of the worn-out customs, such as squandering money on artists, and the black outfits, etc., so as to save up some money for after our marriage. Some people did not like that, but my lifelong friends understood and supported me," said 29-year-old Lemrabet.

Costly wedding traditions can also get in the way of true love. Aisha, a 23-year-old university student, told Magharebia, "Many young men are no longer interested in getting married because of the unjustified high dowries, which is not to the benefit of society in the long run."

Expensive dowries are leading some young men still in their twenties to get married to women in their thirties or forties. This is what Ahmad, 27, did: he married 43-year-old Fatma six months ago.

"I feel quite happy with my wife…she helped me get a job and nurtured all my dreams and aspirations," he told Magharebia.